What does the brain have to do with the behaviors I am seeing? Honestly, Everything. Research in neuroscience has proven that all behaviors are connected to the brain. ALL of them.
When we experience challenging behaviors in our children and teens, it is a warning sign to us that information is missing. Behaviors are communication. When we begin to recognize behaviors are signaling us there is an unmet need, we can begin the process of meeting that need.
As we embrace this perspective, we can parent with greater understanding and compassion, keeping the brain as the center focus, moving ourselves from overwhelmed and frustrated, to encouraged and hopeful, deepening the desired connection between us and our children.
We can experience more joy and a less stressful environment, creating more positive outcomes in our day-to-day, and for their future. We just need to know how to change from what we are doing that isn’t working, to what we can do differently.
As parents, we want the best for our kids. Our deep-rooted love for them will drive us to seek whatever methods we think will help raise up our children “right.” We look for ways to help us "fix" the behaviors we don’t like and move towards our desired behaviors. Parenting a child experiencing behavioral challenges can be overwhelming, frustrating, and exhausting. When traditional parenting methods seem to fail, it can leave us feeling hopeless and desperate. We ask ourselves “What am I doing wrong?” Does this sound familiar?
Maybe you are trying to parent in the ways that you were raised. Maybe you’ve done a lot of reading and trying what the books, friends, or other family members suggest. Yet when these methods are used, they actually make things worse. You may be left exhausted, frustrated, feeling disconnected from your child, and possibly even hopeless. I know how you feel. I've been there, and it's not easy.
Understanding how the brain relates to the behaviors you're seeing is key to supporting your child the way they need. Practical ideas that you can put into place at home right away will lessen your frustration and create a better family dynamic.